Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse
by Colossal Titan's Hoe
Summary: Hey, I'm Max. I felt bad for you Survivors, so I'm writing a survival guide so that you don't, ya know... die.
1. Prologue

_**SURVIVING THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE**_

by Max Strider

**Prologue: Hey**

Hey, my name is Max. It's currently sometime in maybe March or 2017. The infected started spreading about 5 or 6 years ago. You lose count sometimes. If I'm killed, I hope someone in need of help will find this. Or maybe if this all blows over, it'll go down in history. Or maybe I'll survive and sell it as a memoir. I mean I'm more likely to live than the Survivors are.

Oh, I left out one important detail: I'm infected.

I know, I know, you're thinking, "Why should I listen to the advice of an Infected? All they do it kill." But keep in mind that you Survivors are extremely irritating, not to mention tempting. I really don't care if you end up no listening to my advise. But just read it anyway and think about how logical it actually is. You'd be surprised.

I'll be covering a number of topics, from Infected Basics, to the Special Infected, to what you should do to avoid zombie confrontations. I highly recommend listening to my advice. Unless you want to join the majority of us as Infected.

Best of luck,

Max


	2. Chapter 1: History of the Infection

_**SURVIVING THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE**_

by Max Strider

**Chapter 1: History of the Infection**

No one really knows how the Infection started or why it started. However, there are theories among the Infected and Survivors.

Disease

The most common and most likely theory is that the Infection is an air-borne disease. Within this theory, there are also theories about how the disease came to be:

1) Maybe there was a horrible biohazard accident in a lab somewhere. First the people present got it, killed or turned whoever didn't, and then spread it to the rest of the world.

2) Maybe it happened naturally, where some mutation or derivation of an animal disease ended up affecting one individual, and then many, until the world got it.

3)The lease likely is mainly reserved for the hippies. The "man" had a plan for world annihilation or population reduction. Maybe they didn't mean for it to be this wide-scale. Maybe they wanted to kill off the human race with the exception of a select few (national leaders, million and billionaires, etc.) and planned on starting the world anew. Sounds likely, right? (Note the sarcasm.)

Drugs

So we've all heard of the notorious drug "bath salts," and how it supposedly caused a man to gnaw another man's face off. Some people think that the Infection was caused by a drug similar to it. But if that was so, how could the Infection have been spread through drugs unless everyone was on the drug.

Moving on from the causes of the Infection, there is also the obvious but mentionable effects of the Infection. The actual process of changing will be covered in other chapters. But generally, for all Infected, they contract it through either a bite from another Infected or through the air. All changing processes are very painful, but the level of pain depends on the person and the type of Infected. The Special Infected tend to experience more pain while mutating than Common Infected, since they go through more drastic physical changes.

Being an Infected, I'm able to safely observe the changing processes of other Infected, along with having experienced it I'm a pretty reliable source for this information. If you don't really care about our suffering ("our" referring to the Infected) then you can just skip the next few chapters, which will give a profile on each type of Infected.

If you are interested to hear the intricacies of each Infected, then move on to the next chapter.


	3. Chapter 2: General Infected

_**SURVIVING THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE**_

by Max Strider

**Chapter 1: General Infected**

By now, you will have came in conflict with at least one or a thousand Infected, whether Common or Special. This chapter will discuss the basics, like what you should know about all Infected, regardless. The specifics about the different kinds of Infected will be discussed in later chapters.

_ALL_ Infected

Contrary to the typical mindless zombie image we get in movies and video games, we do still feel. A lot. But for most of us, pain makes us even more aggravated, and will probably try to kill you even more aggressively and painfully. Though Common Infected don't have coherent thoughts, per se, unlike the Special Infected, they still recognize pain.

Infected, contrary to beliefs, are not braindead. Our brains are still functional, some more than others. Now, I'm no scientist, nor was I when I was normal, so I have no idea what part of the brain is affected by the Green Flu, but I can tell you that we're far from dead, or even undead. (This also suggests that a cure could be found, so hang in there.) Being undead would suggest we had died at some point, but were still walking. I assure you that it's something like rabies, where the person doesn't die, but they're brain gets fucked up by the disease, but they still remain alive. Now, some people who catch the Green Flu don't make it - that is, they die from it, rather than being killed by a Survivor. And it does happen. A lot.

Common Infected

Common Infected are the Infected you normally see just wandering around, sometimes groaning in pain or something that you don't care about. It they see you, they'll be able to tell you're not Infected. I'm not sure how. But they can. And they will come after you. They probably have it the worse, since they're in constant pain, they are unable to form coherent thoughts, and they're the ones that can just give out. Since I can't have an actual conversation with them, I'm not sure, but I think that their pain is something like a body ache, where everything hurts all at once. I feel really bad for them but, hey, what can you do?

Special Infected

The least common of the Infected are the Special Infected. I've encountered about 8 different kinds of Special Infected - Hunter (me), Smoker (my boyfriend), Witch, Boomer, Tank, Charger, Spitter, and Jockey. Each have their own abilities and mutations. All Special Infected have some sort of external and usually very obvious mutation, if not many, unlike the Common Infected. Also unlike the Common Infected, Special Infected go through one change where we experience extreme pain. The process varies for the 8 types of Special Infected, but afterwards, little to no pain is experienced on a daily basis, save for bullets every now and again. Overall, though, you want to avoid Special Infected at all costs.

Well that was a general introduction to the next nine or ten chapters, which will be about the different Infected, more in detail.

*CHANGE IN HANDWRITING*

_HELLO PUNY SURVIVORS! I AM YOUR FIRELORD OZAI COMING TO BURN DOWN YOU _HOPE_. MUAHAHAHAHA._

_Okay, so I'm really Max's boyfriend, Alex. I'm a Smoker. I find it hilarious that he's writing this. Who the hells gonna find it, exactly? And how? Oh well, if it makes him happy._

_What he's said is true, though. Special Infected feel emotions just like you do. Like the last time we ate a Survivor, Max sulked in a corner for like a week. He also gets really insecure in bed sometimes. We have many friends who are Special Infected that we consider almost family. We get along fine, even though we have our beefs, just like any other group of I guess regular friends don't discuss old movies over the rotting remains of some Survivor._

_Shit, he's coming! Okay I'll go now, but just remember this:_

_ZOMBIES ARE PEOPLE, TOO!_


	4. Chapter 3: Common Infected

_**SURVIVING THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE**_

by Max Strider

**Chapter 3: Common Infected**

Common Infected are the more common infected, but I guess you already knew that. If not, you might be one. They're the least troublesome alone, but they seldom travel alone. Usually, there'll be several densely packed into an area, making avoidance very difficult. They're basically anywhere you can think of: playgrounds, parks, houses, prisons, even occasionally safe houses (which will be discussed later).

Who Becomes a Common Infected?

Just about anyone can become a Special Infected. They can be young, old, short, tall, male or female, it doesn't matter. However, some Infected people become Common or Special Infected for only a sort time, before their bodies give out and they die for real. No possible revival. As depressing as that is, they're probably the luckiest ones of all.

What Happens While Becoming A Common Infected?

Well, as I said before, it slowly progresses until you are an Infected. The pain becomes more heightened and you start losing memories, first small things, like the names of movies or celebrities. Then you forget the names and even faces of acquaintances, then close friends, then even family members. The last thing you forget is how to speak. Right before that if your name. While you're forgetting things, you're also falling apart on the inside. Your usually leak fluids (mostly blood), usually through your mouth, nose, and eyes. You also, of course, experience pain. This time is probably the most painful for Common Infected, as far as I can tell from just watching my friends and random wandering Infected.

What Happens After I Change?

Define "after." You're technically always changing. Your pain comes from this slow changes. They include the shifting, tearing, and leakage of your organs. You will continue to leak blood and other fluids, but your body, still being alive, is alive enough to still produce more of these fluids. Less of the fluids are produced when and Infected doesn't eat. And they're favorite snack? Why, people, of course.

What Should I Do When Faced With A Common Infected?

Common Infected are easier to kill than Special Infected. Depending on where you hit them, they can be taken down with from 1 to 15 bullets. It also depends on the gun or weapon. As zombie stereotypes suggest, decapitation is 100% effective. But keep in mind that it's not as easy as it looks in the movies. Decapitation is easiest with something heavy, like an ax, or even a chainsaw if you can find one somewhere. But remember, for these things to work, you have to get close to them, giving them a chance to slash at you. So I recommend a gun or two. **(A/N: I haven't played in a while so I don't actually remember actual shot amounts, so I'm guessing based on what I can remember.) **Pistols are easy to use, light, don't pack to much of a recoil, and are easy to reload. However, it can take 3 shots to the head or about 6 shots to the body to kill a Common Infected with one. It should be your second to last resort (last being a melee weapon). You should try to get your hands on bigger guns. Automatic Machine Guns are good, if you're surrounded by them. But they don't pack a big punch. It takes maybe 10 or 20 bullets to really kill them. If you're in an inactive area, and you're just sniping out ones that wander near your hiding spot, get an assault rifle or shot gun. They're heavy and have a really powerful recoil, but they're super powerful and efficient. They can take down a zombie with one shot to the head, or two or three to the body. That is, if you play your cards right. However, if your trying to be discrete from a hiding spot or something, get a silencer. Most rifles are really loud, so they'll attract the attention or other Infected. Also, they don't take many bullets at once and they're bullets can be heavy, so you want to use them sparingly. If you're not a good aim, get a scope and maybe even a laser sight. It does help a lot. Cause, ya know, we can't all be master snipers.

How Do They Interact With Other Infected?

They don't really do anything. They'll bump into each other and just groan and walk away. I don't know how they know who is and isn't Infected. They just do. I don't suggest testing any personal theories unless you're okay with dying. But their bodies are pretty hot, seeing as this is a flu, so maybe they can, like, see the lack of heat radiating off of your body. I can't really tell.

As far as interacting with Special Infected, they do the same as they do with Common Infected: NOTHING. I once held onto the back of the neck of one that was just walking around and all he did was keep moving forward.

Being ignored is annoying. So I distastefully call them "Walkers" and tend to avoid them.

AM I A COMMON INFECTED?

No. You can read this, so you're not. If you can't read this, you're either stupid, or you're a Common Infected. Not that this can really inform you of those things at this point. But if you're not Infected by now, you probably won't be (the reason why will be discussed in later chapters.)

How to Avoid Common Infected

Well, there is no way for me to know or test how to avoid detention, but you could probably find a small lockable room that seems pretty sturdy. Make sure there is some means of looking at the outside of the door and make sure everything that can be lock is locked. Common Infected are pretty claustrophobic, so they don't like small rooms. It's unlikely to find many in a small room. There are also things called Saferooms that will be discussed later that you can go into if you run into it.

Is This A Common Infected?

Key physical aspects and actions unique to the Common Infected are:

~A disheveled appearance

~Blood spilling over from the mouth or eyes

~An overall unchanged physical structure; very human (as compared to Special Infected mutations)

~Groaning

~Bumping into or leaning on walls

~Incoherent sounds/speech patterns

~Cataracts/fogged over eyes

Also, though it's not found exclusively in the Common Infected, their eyes also reflect light, which is in just about every Infected. They also have grayish skin, which most Special Infected also have.

I Got Bit! What Now?!

You're going to become an Infected. Bottom line. If this isn't the future you want, feel free to kill yourself. If you don't really care, go on and sit somewhere and change. It'll hurt, but if they find a cure, and they cure you, you probably won't remember it unless you're a Special Infected.

However, there is one way you can possibly avoid becoming Infected. You'd need to quickly amputate wherever you were bitten. This isn't 100% fullproof because the Infection could have traveled farther than you could have avoided, meaning you just cut your arm off for nothing. However, if you do successfully rid yourself of the Infection, you've just rendered yourself handicapped, making it harder for you to defend yourself and you'll probably die anyways, so I suggest letting what happens happen.

For Your 411: My Suggestions for Survival

In general, Common Infected are dangerous, but probably the least of your worries. Because you could find an Infected-free room, but you'll need food or blankets or something along those lines or basic needs. You could easily die from exposure or starvation or another illness. So avoiding Infecting shouldn't really be your number one priority, as crazy as it sounds. It should be to get what you need to survive. Get food that won't go bad, like canned food or granola bars or something. Also, I think I already mentioned this, but if I didn't, people will probably not let you into their safehouses, whether it's a random Survivor in a house somewhere or the government's actual safe havens. It's just too risky at this point in time. I suggest you follow their examples and not let anyone in. It's every man for himself out there for you guys. You want to stay alive as long as possible. Don't give up, no matter how horrible it may seem.


End file.
